The alarm rings in the disappointingly insistency that I ‘must’ arise and greet the day, stupid alarm. It’s about 6am and I roll over and respond with groans of denial. Just five more minutes? Why is that so magical? Why!?

I get up, walk towards the shower while scratching something.

After my body mind and soul has been washed clean I perform the final check to make sure I haven’t forgotten the astonishing amount of items I feel are all essential to bring on a trip like this and we actually close the door on the place that has been our home for the past few days.

Hyderabad airport.

We arrive! Nothing special to say there, possibly the explanation mark is a little overdoing it but there you are. We arrive at the airport and passing the initial security I proceed to the always fun bag screening. I place my two bags, one very light the other very heavy onto the scanning belt and through it goes and I ready in line for the metal door screening.

A shout from the guard, “is this your bag?” I’m asked not unkindly

“Yes” I answer

The guard passes me the bag and the universal sign of ‘take more of your stuff out’ to which I comply, this time the iPad and other stuff then proceed to stand back in line.

Another shout from the guard “is this also your bag?” I am asked again.

Yes

He passes it to me and shouts “camera, take out” . Then a businessman, kind fellow leans in and gives me a piece of advice from one traveler to the next, “just take all of it out, better this way” and gives me a knowing nod, I give him a smile back and also a knowing nod.

You see the problem is, in the heavy bag, there are about 50 different items in there. To take ‘all’ of it out would take some time. So I take out the cameras place them, all four to them in the trays and then stand back ready for the pat down.

I am patted down and move to the end of ready to stand to wait for my bags.

The guard comes over and with a hint of a smile like this is possibly the most interesting encounter he has experienced all morning he says to me “ take out chargers and lenses”

“Oh really?” I answer which is stupid, they never joke.. they will never ever say “Naaaah just our little joke, go on ahead!” Because they are there to protect us from all the people to which want to do us harm. That doesn’t leave a lot of room for jokes. So the lenses come out as well and the chargers.

So as it turns out the man was right. Bless you seasoned traveler of these parts passing on your advice.

Gods above I want coffee, nooo I need a coffee! This is Hyderabad and we are heading to the business lounge, platinum, gold or whatever rare metal they name these after these days.. tungsten maybe.. there is bound be coffee so wonderful I am going to be reduced to my knees in praise of the coffee gods!! I just know it!

Oh boy I was wrong, I was so wrongly wrong wrong that if there was ever a need for the king of Wrongland then they would come to me and say, Sire! Thy country needs thou!

Because what I saw was a machine that honestly just wanted to die and in fact was more akin to a spitting lama than a coffee machine at all. I stood, kind of shocked as a businessman, dressed sharply stands before the machine, places the cup and presses the button depicting a latte from the heavens. The machine spotted to life, it spat, it gurgled and then it spat some more. When he retracted the cup he just stared at the end product of all that unattractive noise with a look of “what the hell is this?”

My turn.

I grab the same cup, press the same button, except different results and was disappointed to find the pathetic excuse of a coffee my friend previously received was the same I was to receive. I left, knowing this was not going to be a good experience. Oh how far I have come from the Roastery.

Ok, let’s do this.

The Cup.
A small cup just large enough for the lounge to say we have supplied a cup and that’s it.

DSCF6714
The ghost of a coffee

The coffee.
I don’t’ think this is even coffee, t just tastes like powdered milk. I’m sorry but I can’t go on… I’m going to head back and try again.

As I head back there is another season traveler and he has an idea. He takes his cup to the ready to pour drip coffee and fills that up about 70%. Then takes the cup the angry machine and presses just ‘milk’. He receives it and walks away..

Hello!!!

I do the same, oh my god this looks like coffee! I might actually get to drink coffee this morning!

I give him a “Cheers!” And he returns a very confused “Do I know you?” Look but cheers me all the same and I walk off. I taste this Frankenstein creation.. And you know what!? It’s still bloody horrible but at least this time it actually tastes like coffee!

DSCF6716
My second attempt

Congratulations Hyderabad Platinum lounge, you have possibly the worst coffee in India! Please for the benefit of all that rely on you fix this! There are a lot of businessmen and woman that need this to be on their game as they go about working hard for the mother country. You have an opportunity to delight them with something truly wonderful and thus I am sure will directly result in their ability to get their job done! Which will bring more money into Hyderabad, which means more taxes and I’m sure an improved city and thus country all round.

It all starts with you Hyderabad Airport Platinum lounge! The burden is large but I am sure you can do it! I believe in you!!!


Stuff I like!

I’m going to start recommending gear and stuff that I really like. Everything you see on this site has been hand-picked by me. The first one for this is the GoPro Hero 7. Why? Well these guys are simply the best at making compact action cameras. This hero 7 really goes above and beyond with all the features.. The two that stand out for me are

  1. The stabilisation is insanely Good!
  2. 4k video at 60 frames a second? Why do I love that! Well a 4k video is pretty damn good as a photo it self. Sooooo take a 4k video and choose the shot you like late.

https_blueprint-api-production.s3.amazonaws.comuploadscardimage849053542526fd-13af-4b45-bdbf-1c0bc2970412

Anyway they are the best so you want something small that is waterproof and will take amazing videos, the GoPro Hero 7 is my pick!

Click to checkout 

credit – mashable.com

 

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